Random thoughts with no connection
So a couple things on my mind today.
First, GO TIGERS! I am a Detroit Tigers convert, and I am thrilled to see them doing so well. For the record, I've been cheering for my "home town" team since I moved here, not just starting this year. I was watching the playoff game today against the Yankees and found myself after the final out looking something like this:
In my pj's (I'm feeling a little under the weather and was too lazy to get dressed) on the couch with my arms in the air yelling "YES! WOOOOOT!" I felt pretty silly sitting there yelling by myself with Josh and Carly looking at me like I was a nut case.
Second, we heard from our adoption agency worker today. Her name is Courtney and she is fantastic. She has fought for us since she got put on this case. Unfortunately, she has had to give us bad news over and over and over and over. It helps marginally that I know she feels bad about these calls. Today she called to tell us that someone at DHS finally located Carly's file which had been pulled for review for some unknown reason. A state worker is going to be calling us to come and visit Carly sometime in the next few days. After that, the state will assign a foster care worker to her at which point (and here is the kicker) they will assign an agency. There is no guarantee it will be OUR agency. What does that mean?? We don't really know, but it could mean a few things like: they may want to move Carly, they may want to check over our file with a fine tooth comb, they may want to move Carly to a new foster home. We don't know! Carly is now 14 months old and STILL in foster care, and still our petition to adopt her has not been filed in Oakland county (although we have one in Macomb county), and STILL we don't know what tomorrow might bring. The worst thing of all is that they could decide we're not fit and take her away. Our fate, her fate, is totally up to the state. It makes no difference that Carly has lived with us for almost a year, that we have spent every day with her since she was born. Well, that's a TAD dramatic, it makes some difference. But, bottom line, the state could decide our income, health, situation is not sufficient and take her away. Whenever they want. When we had Josh, we strapped him in the carseat and drove away and that was that. Carly has always had a safe, warm home with electricity and food and diapers and love. What is more important than that? When it comes to a question of whether or not I'm a fit parent, what matters more than that she is healthy, learning, growing, loved, and happy? So what if sometimes my house is messy, if I am slow to get her immunizations (but she does get them!), if I don't pay every bill on time every month. If Carly's birth mother had not tested positive for drugs in the hospital, the state would have sent Carly home with her without a second thought and yet I have to prove over and over that I'm fit. I despise being only Carly's "foster mother", if tomorrow something happened to either Eric or me she would be, most likely, removed. I can't see how this, any of this, is in her best interest. A home under the constant strain of what if, a mother under the constant fear of losing her, a brother who would be devastated at the loss of the sister he loves beyond all others - the situation is ridiculous when framed in the context of Carly's best interest. All Carly cares about is being where she feels secure and loved. And that's here.
Third - well actually most everything is blocked out by what came second.
First, GO TIGERS! I am a Detroit Tigers convert, and I am thrilled to see them doing so well. For the record, I've been cheering for my "home town" team since I moved here, not just starting this year. I was watching the playoff game today against the Yankees and found myself after the final out looking something like this:
In my pj's (I'm feeling a little under the weather and was too lazy to get dressed) on the couch with my arms in the air yelling "YES! WOOOOOT!" I felt pretty silly sitting there yelling by myself with Josh and Carly looking at me like I was a nut case.
Second, we heard from our adoption agency worker today. Her name is Courtney and she is fantastic. She has fought for us since she got put on this case. Unfortunately, she has had to give us bad news over and over and over and over. It helps marginally that I know she feels bad about these calls. Today she called to tell us that someone at DHS finally located Carly's file which had been pulled for review for some unknown reason. A state worker is going to be calling us to come and visit Carly sometime in the next few days. After that, the state will assign a foster care worker to her at which point (and here is the kicker) they will assign an agency. There is no guarantee it will be OUR agency. What does that mean?? We don't really know, but it could mean a few things like: they may want to move Carly, they may want to check over our file with a fine tooth comb, they may want to move Carly to a new foster home. We don't know! Carly is now 14 months old and STILL in foster care, and still our petition to adopt her has not been filed in Oakland county (although we have one in Macomb county), and STILL we don't know what tomorrow might bring. The worst thing of all is that they could decide we're not fit and take her away. Our fate, her fate, is totally up to the state. It makes no difference that Carly has lived with us for almost a year, that we have spent every day with her since she was born. Well, that's a TAD dramatic, it makes some difference. But, bottom line, the state could decide our income, health, situation is not sufficient and take her away. Whenever they want. When we had Josh, we strapped him in the carseat and drove away and that was that. Carly has always had a safe, warm home with electricity and food and diapers and love. What is more important than that? When it comes to a question of whether or not I'm a fit parent, what matters more than that she is healthy, learning, growing, loved, and happy? So what if sometimes my house is messy, if I am slow to get her immunizations (but she does get them!), if I don't pay every bill on time every month. If Carly's birth mother had not tested positive for drugs in the hospital, the state would have sent Carly home with her without a second thought and yet I have to prove over and over that I'm fit. I despise being only Carly's "foster mother", if tomorrow something happened to either Eric or me she would be, most likely, removed. I can't see how this, any of this, is in her best interest. A home under the constant strain of what if, a mother under the constant fear of losing her, a brother who would be devastated at the loss of the sister he loves beyond all others - the situation is ridiculous when framed in the context of Carly's best interest. All Carly cares about is being where she feels secure and loved. And that's here.
Third - well actually most everything is blocked out by what came second.
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then I just copied the html code it generates into the right spot and viola! There is an option on there to create your own but I'm not that brave quite yet. If you try it, you'll have to tell me if its worth the effort.