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The old addage No News Is Good News

Is a load of crap.

First off you should know that the hospital policy where Dad is staying is that you can't get info over the phone about patients. I understand the theory behind this, protecting privacy and blah blah blah, but in practice? It really sucks.

Despite Cute Pam's offer of babysitting (I will probably take you up on this at some point!) I decided I would stay at home today and let Poppa rest and recover. The Dr's know what they are doing (right?) and he is best taken care of in their hands. The effort it would require on his part to have a visitor {X} the effort it would require on my part to go visit {=} me waiting around at home for an update. It's simple geometry. And you thought I couldn't do math.

The hospital didn't call us today, which they were supposed to do in case of emergency/bad news etc.

No news is good news, right? (Please refer to the above statement for the answer, if you haven't already figured it out.)

Eric went to see his Dad after work. Eric was feeling pretty upbeat because, hey! the hospital didn't call so it must be alright. Well, Poppa had a rough day, you might say. The dye they gave him so that they could assess his heart function is not good for his kidneys. So they're failing. That's bad news part one. Part 2? He is bleeding somewhere in his stomach, and has been for a while they think. He was spitting up blood all day and they finally decided to put a tube down poor Dad's nose and drain the blood out. 2 containers worth of blood. (Gross, I'm sorry but really you'll just have to skim if you're not vitally interested. This is the point where a family blog is more about family than your discomfort and a blog is really good for updating everyone at the same time.) Part 3? They don't know why he is bleeding or where it is coming from.

So tomorrow he is going to have dialysis in the morning to help his poor kidneys and a scope in the afternoon to try and find the source of the bleeding and stop it. If they can find the source and fix it, they will operate. If he is able to be operated on. As I'm sure you can imagine, he is weak and tired. He can't eat, but they're giving him the sad sad substitute of ice chips until midnight tonight. He will not be allowed to have visitors tomorrow or (most likely) the next day. Which, you know, stinks since they won't provide updates over the phone. (I'm not sure how that's going to work.)

Eric says he looks rough. (Understandably.) Eric is also quite fragile himself right now (sorry to rat you out dearest) and appreciates very much your encouragement and support. You might think that your words and thoughts and prayers don't mean a lot. But they do. They really, really do.

I know some of you are wondering how the rest of us are handling it. I'm fine. Scared, sad, worried, helpless but peaceful. I feel like whatever happens will be in Dad's best interest and part of the plan a loving Heavenly Father has for Dad. That doesn't make me feel good about this all, but it makes me feel calm. I apologize to those of you I spoke with/texted earlier in the day with a generic "he's stable and we think ok", I honestly didn't know he was having a hard day at the hospital. I'm glad I didn't try to go and visit because I really feel I would have just been in the way.

Josh is freaked out. We heard today that Aunt Marty (Uncle Jim's spectacular wife) also went to the hospital today and Josh's comment was "Everything is falling apart." Josh's coping mechanism is to just shut out the bad, but with so much of it confronting him and tears on his dad's face Josh feels pretty rotten on the whole. I explained to the best of my ability that we just have to trust the Dr's and pray and love each other as much as we can. But when you're 10, that doesn't quite give immediate satisfaction.

Carly is, overall, clueless. She gets upset when we're upset, she says we "lost" Poppa (her common term for someone being out of eyesight) and otherwise is her chipper, loud, DIVA self. She changed clothes twice today, snuck some of my makeup, and drove the dog to distraction. (Aka she is doing fine.)

Scott is an enigma. He deals with things in his way. He's worried, a little quieter than normal, and somewhat distracted.

We are coping and trying to just stay focused on now rather than what might come.

Thank you all for your continued expressions of support and love. They mean the world.

And that's not a load of crap.


Pam said…
Let me know the day and time for babysitting. Have you thought about the prayer roll? Just a thought. Love ya bunches and I am on-call to help.
Anonymous said…
I have to give a shout to Pam in humungous thanks for being there to help out when some of us are too far away to help with many things. THANKS!!
Oh. My. Freak.

AMS said…
So sorry, Sarah. Your family is in our prayers. You've got a great attitude! It's great to have the gospel in our lives and know and understand that whatever happens it'll be okay.

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