Monday, September 14

The post in which I turn into a hypo-chondriac

Have you ever googled an illness just because maybe, possibly, you think you might have said illness?

It's a fascinating process, especially when Google totally reads your mind and fills in the blank for you. Is that a sign? Should I take it as one? Google totally gave me a sign today.

So I googled this certain illness/disease/condition and read about the fun symptoms associated with it. Let's go down the list, shall we?

- Night sweats - check (but don't forget the random fluctuation from cold to burning hot)
- Hot flashes - redundant check
- Insomnia - check but also a normal state of being for me
- Headaches - yup
- Joint or muscle pain - occasional
- Body shape changes are also common, causing you to put on weight around the abdomen - and here I thought gravity had just changed direction
- Water retention - I wouldn't know, what with this spare tire inflated around my middle
- Emotional ups and downs - Should I laugh or cry about this one? Check
- Anxiety - Have you met my parents? This is inherited. Nevertheless, check
- Cravings - Can I have chocolate on that? Check!
- Forgetfulness - Dude I haven't seen my brain since I gave birth. Check
- Fatigue - Triple check
- Mood swings - Seriously, check
- Depression - Isn't that just the bottom end of the last symptom? Check

The good news is, I'm pretty sure I'm not dying (phew). The bad news is, I have to go to the Dr. I think to figure this out. And I really don't like doctors. Especially when they do that weighing in thing.

Sigh.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are soooooooo in trouble for the anxiety comment. The parents are living up to the accusation :)

Sarah said...

They are nothing if not predictable!

Heather said...

I totally had a comment, but it left the moment I saw the words PUMPKIN PIE.... yum, yum.

Nevertheless, good luck on the Dr visit. I'll be thinking of you.

That Girl said...

Dude. WebMD promised me that our family has had everything from leukemia to Hodgkins to bipolar disorder.

Turns out, none of us do.

Go figure.