Letters to my family

-
Dear Eric,


I just wanted to say thank you.  Thank you for going to work every single day.  Thank you for trying your hardest and not resting on your many laurels.  Thank you for not accepting 'good enough', but pushing for 'best' instead. 

Thank you for teaching Josh.  For sitting next to him in your office, often listening to endless chit chat while you are trying to work.  Thank you for guiding him and pushing him and helping him succeed.  Thank you for recognizing that he needs to be stretched to his limits.  Thank you for scheduling, grading, and reviewing his many MANY papers.  It is a hard job to homeschool a kid, no less while you are trying to work full time in the same room.

Thank you for believing in me.  For letting me sleep in on my days off from school.  For making dinner so often.  For doing the wretched dishes.  For taking our children OUT before I EXPLODE some days.  Thank you for getting Carly off to school every day.

I see what you do, I appreciate what you do, I know it is all for me.  I'm sorry I haven't been helping as much as I should.  I'm sorry I'm tricking myself into believing I am over taxed, over burdened and over tired.  I will try to be the wife you deserve. 

Love,

Me

--

Dear Joshua,

You rock.  Seriously. 

Your feet stretch almost to the end of your bed.  You wear the same size shoes as I do.  You are constantly changing and thinking and making up excuses.  Your brain is a mine field of useless (useful to you) facts.  You're funny and kind and silly.  Sometimes you are mean to your sister...but let's not talk about that. 

Mostly, you are just a really great kid and I count myself lucky every time I get to kiss your face.

Love,

Mom

--

Dear Carly,

I was watching a show the other night.  I may or may not have been "Teen Mom" on MTV.  Only the shadow knows.  One of the mothers on this fascinating show gave her child up for adoption.  On this particular episode, the teen mom was visiting her daughter (Carly, ironic eh?) and her adoptive family.  And when they looked at each other, it was like sparks going off between them.  Little love sparks.

I marvel at the bravery Carly's mother had.  How brave to give her daughter away in hopes of a brighter future.  How brave to visit knowing that she will leave her daughter behind when she leaves.  How brave to love, unabashed, anyhow - opening her heart and soul regardless of the impending torture that will follow. 

I am not the brave sort.  I could not have given you up.  I am so fortunate that I got to keep you.  How lucky I am to be your second Mom.  You might run to your Daddy for comfort when skinned knees and hurt feelings afflict you, but you are my daughter still.  My little girl in pink.  Or purple.  Or camo, depending on what suits your need.  How lucky I am to walk on this side of the adoption road.  I won't lie and pretend this is an easy road - on either side - but I'm glad I chose it.  I'm glad I was chosen for it.  I'm glad I have you.

Love,

Mommy

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thanks honey. We think you are pretty darn awesome!!! :)
9:27 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Dear Carly,

-
Image
I assume that one day you will come to me wanting to know who you are, where you came from, where your other family is and why they gave you to us.  I offer you little bits of information already, but certainly not crumbs enough to satisfy the appetite.  Perhaps it won't matter to you.  I am assuming a lot, already, about how adoption will impact your life. People often wonder why adoptive parents are hurt when their children seek out biological roots.  I have the answer, and it's very simple.  Adoption - at its core - makes us question the legality, authority, voracity, and validity of parenthood.  For most adoptive parents, first you must come to terms with an issue that strikes at the foundations of mortality: fertility.  From birth, most of us are driven to form families.  First we are nestlings, nurtured and weened and eventually taught to fly.  Then we are nest-builders, filling our lives with the stuff necessary to drive life forward.  Knowledge, safety, money, a stur
Read more

M is for Mother

-
Motherhood is more than carrying a child in your womb for 9 months. Motherhood is more than daily wiping of noses, cleaning of faces, filling of bellies. Motherhood is more than driving, shopping, cleaning, cooking. Motherhood is part of being a Woman, but not all of it. It is part of growing up, for some of us. It is conducive to gaining appreciation, but not for everyone. I was still a child myself, really, when I became a Mother. Joshua and I did a lot of growing up together. We both learned a lot about sacrifice. I learned how to say good-bye to him in the morning, he learned that separation from Mother wasn't such a bad thing after all. Especially since he got to go to Grandma's house (which, sorry Disney, was the happiest place on earth). I learned I could love someone until my heart might burst and be completely enraged at the same time. He learned that the wrinkling of my forehead was not a good sign for anyone. We learned a lot about time, more specifically abo
Read more

And I didn't prepare a speech!

-
Image
My first, and probably only, blogger award! Yay! Thanks to That Girl in Brazil, not only uber cute but uber sweet. I'm supposed to pass on the love to other bloggers by linking them and then posting in their comments. But, seriously, how much more ad space do you guys need? Ok, ok, fine. I pick Mary cause she totally posted her flip flops. And justRandi cause she said she'd come to my house if I sent her an invite. And llegue because she made reference to a certain male body part while shopping in Wal-Mart, plus she beats me at games. and Heather because she makes me giggle and she comments even when my posts are lame. Just passin the <3 I feel super guilty for not linking everybody. But, you wouldn't be on my blog roll if I didn't think you were super cool.
Read more