Monday, January 9

You GUYS,

I'm not sure if you've heard, but there are other blogs out there to read.

I know, shocker.

And here we've been operating under the assumption that I am the only blog on the planet worth reading and I have 8000 views to prove it. It's possible about 7500 of those are my own clicks but SERIOUSLY, 500 is a lot.  I've been reading some of these blogs to size up the competition and I'm beginning to realize just how amazing I really am.  Like, seriously, so amazing. 

So anyways, because I am so awesome I am going to write a book in the next 30 days. A whole book. While I blog and take care of my kids. I am also going to teach my dog to roll over while I train for a marathon, build an addition and redo my daughter's room. Again. It's not princess-y enough and there are some great antiques at my local thrift shop, circa 1980. This is seriously stuff here, people. It's going to be so hard to do. THIRTY days. That is one more than 29, my eternal age.

Just to emphasize how hard this will be, let me tell you about my multiple injuries. I have a paper cut on my finger, for starters. It actually healed up already because it happened last week but I know where it was and I can remember the pain. Oh, the pain. Also, my feet hurt. It's possible I am wearing the wrong shoes. Namely flip flops. All the time. And last night I only got 8.2 hours of sleep. Adults are supposed to get at least 12 to function properly. I am pretty sure I read that somewhere. So, as you can see, I am going to write this book under seriously difficult conditions. I've already been forwarded a check to get me motivated too. Together with my ads (clicky clicky on the side bar!), I should have enough to buy a new iPhone at walmart. The plastic kind filled with bubble gum. If I borrow five bucks from my kids.

I am so stressed out about writing this book, you have no idea. I can't even bring myself to type. Except for this blog. And website names while I surf the interwebs. I mustered up the energy to do some pinterest and etsy surfing and I am seriously exhausted now so if you could help me out by leaving a comments that I can turn into book material. Be sure to be very prosy and witty. I don't want to have to think too hard because I'm so busy. SO BUSY. I mean, what was I thinking really? I'm glad my husband agreed to make dinner tonight because I need to go lay down now. And watch TV. It will help a lot, all the resting, because I'm SO sleep deprived. And I need all the sleep I can get because I am totally growing out my hair too. Can't wait to post updates! Every day! But when I forget I'll be sure to post some crappy artistically angled pictures of my life for your enjoyment.

I know, I'm a giver.


5 comments:

llegue said...

heh heh heh love the snarky..are you commented on a certain ex-mormon bloggess who thinks she's hot stuff?

Karisa said...

I have no idea what to think about this post. I thought it was really funny, but I can't figure out if you really are writing a book in 30 days. But then again, I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed. Either way, I'm still going to toilet paper your house.

Sarah said...

I guess you will just have to wait with baited breath to find out! TP'ing my house will be another obstacle for me to endure and overcome in my hard, hard life.

Anonymous said...

Be sure to use plenty of duct tape to help embellish the improved princess room. There is so much more room available to decorate when you do! And we know how much the girl loves it ;)

Anonymous said...

I bet the book will be a guidebook, with bonus comparative analysis, of how to reach level 10 with any SWTOR being. It will probably also have bonus testimonials from at least 4 avid players who reside in Edgewood and are related to a Wookie.