Skip to main content

Evolution of a story

Once, a while back, I got a great idea for a funny riff on Lord of the Rings.  We're big fans (of the movies more than the books really) around here, and I thought this would be hilarious if done right.  This is my dusty outline and the question is: is it worth pursuing?  (Side note: I have a ridiculous amount of trouble spelling "pursue".)  Let me know in the comments (or on facebook if that's your mode of choice).

(p.s. These are my ideas and intellectual property and you better not steal them and publish them, especially if it makes a lot of money and I find out about it!)

Lord of the Swings
It’s bad enough being ten years old.  Even worse to be ten years old with thick, curly hair that grows way too fast, over large feet and short legs.  But then my parents had to go and name me Frodo.

That’s right, my name is Frodo B. Wynn, fifth grader.

Frodo – 10 years old, short for his age, curly hair.  His parents were LOTR fanatics and Frodo hates his name.  You can’t even shorten it to anything decent. 
Sam – Frodo’s twin brother

Mary – Frodo’s best friend

Piper – Mary’s sister
Tom Dill  - the new principal of the school

The Ranger – Frodo’s dad Archer, a park ranger.  His mom, Ann Wyn
Hobbits – Frodo and his friends

Rohan – the soccer team, the captain is Elmer Dane (Eomer), his sister Ellen Dane (Eowyn), the coach is their uncle, Theo Dane.
Jim Lee – the gym teacher

Leigh Goles – the art teacher
The ants (ents) – a big hill that won’t die on the far side of the playground.

Mount Doom – the slide (an old metal slide that gets super heated by the sun)
Gollum – a thieving local wild dog that no one can catch, they name it Gollum because it chokes up fish.

Has to save the playground from an evil force, the bully Saul Ron and his minions.
Orcs – 6th graders

Nazgule – Saul’s best friends.
Boromir and Faramir – Bart and Farrel, Frodo’s neighbors.  Bart joins marching band.

“Where’s Bart? I never see him around anymore.”
Farrel shrugged as he pushed his stringy hair out of his eyes, “Practicing that stupid horn again I imagine.”
“I never knew the marching band was the end of your life.”
“Go figure.”

Book 1
A Long-Expected Party – Frodo turns 10, shares the birthday with his grandfather Bill.  Bill’s a little senile and wanders off during the party.   Following the incident, Frodo’s parents decide to move Bill into River’s Dell, a nursing home in the next town.

The Shadow of the Past – Randalf, newly graduated sixth grader, charges Frodo with protecting the playground.  Saul Ron has been biding his time waiting for Randalf to move up to middle school, and now the playground and ripe for the picking.  Frodo decides someone has to stand up for the playground.  His twin brother Sam agrees to help.

Three is Company – Skateboard riders – The Black Riders - (Sauls minions) come searching for Frodo, trying to convince him not to resist Saul’s reign of terror.  Gideon (Lord of the Elves), the student council president, offers his assistance.  Mary and Piper also join the fellowship at this point.
A Short Cut to Mushrooms – Farmer Maggot complains about the black riders and warns Frodo not to get mixed up with them.

A Conspiracy Undressed – Frodo’s dream.
The Old Forest – Old Man Willow, the science teacher?  Tom Dill saves them.

In the House of Tom Bambadil – Tom Dill’s office
Fog in the Barrow-downs – Tom Dill saves them again.

At the Sign of the Prancing Pony – in trouble with Dad
Strider – getting to know Dad better

A Stab in the Dark – the black riders attack
Flight in the Ford – Grandpa rescues Frodo in his beat up ford.

(My personal favorite thus far - though still unwritten - is Flight in the Ford...teehee!)


Popular posts from this blog

Dear Carly,

I assume that one day you will come to me wanting to know who you are, where you came from, where your other family is and why they gave you to us.  I offer you little bits of information already, but certainly not crumbs enough to satisfy the appetite.  Perhaps it won't matter to you.  I am assuming a lot, already, about how adoption will impact your life.

People often wonder why adoptive parents are hurt when their children seek out biological roots.  I have the answer, and it's very simple.  Adoption - at its core - makes us question the legality, authority, voracity, and validity of parenthood.  For most adoptive parents, first you must come to terms with an issue that strikes at the foundations of mortality: fertility.  From birth, most of us are driven to form families.  First we are nestlings, nurtured and weened and eventually taught to fly.  Then we are nest-builders, filling our lives with the stuff necessary to drive life forward.  Knowledge, safety, money, a sturdy …

On being away from home and turning sixteen: a letter to my son

Dear Josh,

I missed your sixteenth birthday.  I'm sure you recall - or maybe it wasn't so bad because you spent the whole day with your friend watching movies.  Godzilla and Guardians of the Galaxy, you've said.  It's no surprise to me that Godzilla was your favorite of the two.  That atomic green monster holds a special place in your heart.

It was very difficult for me to be away from you when you crossed this threshold in your life.  I remember turning sixteen, being sixteen, and wondering when I would feel like I was actually sixteen.  When I was sixteen, I went and found my first job, I started driving myself around, and I pretty much felt like I was in the wrong skin.  I'm only now, at 37, beginning to feel in the right skin.  Or at least comfortable with the skin I'm in.  But you - well, you don't seem to have a problem being you.  I can't explain how very happy that makes me feel, how very reassured.  Because it can be really hard not to like you…

Hello? Is it me you're looking for?

You know when you see someone again and it's been, like, forever, and you're not really even sure that you're getting their name right and you wonder WHAT on EARTH they've done to their hair/face/body/children and you can't quite find the right words to fill the gap between time and space?
My second year of teaching is just beginning - and isn't that a wonder?  Last year...let's just say, we all survived.  Last year involved:
- Commuting home (2 hours, one way) almost every weekend - The kids and I here (in Espanola, where I teach) while Eric stayed in Edgewood - Putting our (still for sale) house on the market - Two semesters of Master's classes (what was I thinking??? on the up side, I only have 1 semester left and I am DONE.  D. O. N. E.) - Saturday's spent in professional development - My first ever "work trip" to San Diego 
And this year:
- Josh is a Senior (whuuuut!) - Carly started 5th grade - We all live here in Espanola (double WH…